Mallory Ortberg, Slate

Mallory Ortberg


California, United States

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  • Slate
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Past articles by Mallory:

The Truth Behind the Steele Dossier

Glenn Simpson of Fusion GPS explains why the story about it distracted us from the facts within it. → Read More

Dear Prudence Uncensored: the Mother-Daughter Pregnancies

Every week, Daniel and Nicole Cliffe discuss a Prudie letter. This week: My mom is pregnant at the same time as me, and I’m mad about it. Nicole: Oh, gosh. Well, I love her self-awareness around this issue, for starters. That’s a lot of the battle: recognizing your feelings are not your mother’s fault, etc. She DOES need to talk about these feelings, whether that’s with her husband or a… → Read More

Help! My Friends Are Crushing Life, and I’m Stuck in Neutral.

Dear Prudence: “Everyone my age seems to be married or engaged, buying houses, having babies, and getting promotions.” → Read More

Help! My Husband Got a Vasectomy Without Telling Me.

Dear Prudence: He didn’t want "an accident" to happen. → Read More

Dear Prudence Uncensored: The Cuckold

“This is all very, ‘The others must never know, doctor. It would be too much for them to bear’ Victorian stalwart concealing their tuberculosis diagnosis.” → Read More

Help! I’m Mexican American. My Father Is a White Supremacist. Do I Have to Talk to Him?

I’ve washed my hands of him, but he still wants to talk to me. → Read More

Help! Should I Tell My Roommate That I Can Hear Him Having Sex?

Dear Prudie: “Maybe this is just a part of adult-roommate life.” → Read More

Help! My Dad Is Dying a Slow and Awful Death, and My Siblings Aren’t Around to Help.

Dear Prudence: “Should I call my brother and sisters away from their busy lives to help, even though his last moments could be months away?” → Read More

Help! My Heterosexual Daughter Is Dating a Trans Man.

Dear Prudence: “I’ve always been supportive of LGBT issues, but I feel a little wary.” → Read More

Help! A Pushy Date Is Moving Too Fast. How Do I Rebuff Him Without Making It Awkward?

Dear Prudie: “Last night I went on a date with a man who would not stop trying to kiss me.” → Read More

Help! My Wife Insists on Tracking Our College Daughter’s Location at All Times.

I think it’s an invasion of her privacy. → Read More

Help! What if My Prospective Boss Finds Out That I’m a Former Sex Worker?

Dear Prudence: I got a great job offer that’s contingent on a background check. The problem? I used to be a sex worker. → Read More

Help! My Toddler Found Grandma’s Sex Toys.

Dear Prudence: “The array in that drawer left me with many, many questions.” → Read More

Dear Prudence Uncensored: The Pushy Matchmakers

A hearty trencherwoman who briefly cheers up the protagonist. → Read More

Help! My Parents Expect Me to Share a Bed With My Brother.

I’m a 30-year-old woman and this is messed up. → Read More

Help! Do I Have to Spend Holidays With My Partner’s Ex-Wife?

Dear Prudie: “My partner wants me to spend holidays with his ex-wife, their four children, and many of his in-laws.” → Read More

Help! I’m Terrified That My Mental Illness Is Going to Ruin My Relationship.

Dear Prudence: “I worry he won’t leave me when he can’t take it anymore because he won’t want to hurt me.” → Read More

Dear Prudence Uncensored: The Immature Boss

“Please don’t feign sign language at me as a joke.” → Read More

Help! My Boss Made Fun of My Hearing Loss.

She’s always like this, and HR does nothing about it. → Read More

Help! My Biological Mom Wants Me to Disown My Adoptive Mom.

“Jane’s violent, angry, and manipulative transgressions over the years have made her a pariah.” → Read More