Heather Schwedel, Slate

Heather Schwedel


New York, NY, United States

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Past articles by Heather:

I’ve Been Trapped Under Six Feet of Snow for Two Weeks. Here’s How That’s Going.

I thought the hardest part would be shoveling ourselves out. Turns out it was being completely forgotten by the county. → Read More

It Is Honestly Hard to Believe Everything That Led to Kellyanne and George Conway’s Divorce

A comprehensive timeline of their very public, very over marriage. → Read More

Don Lemon Is So, So Confused About a Woman’s “Prime.” Let Me Help.

This man man needs Google like the desert needs rain. → Read More

The Great Misunderstanding of Reese Witherspoon

Blithely chasing a middling love interest was never her thing. → Read More

How the Lamest Insult Ever Made Trump Lose His Mind

Trump's been called far worse than a "pussy ass bitch," so why was that the insult that broke the Cheeto's back? → Read More

If Only the Jill Biden–Doug Emhoff Kiss Could Last Forever

Their awkward oral greeting was the best part of the State of the Union address, and I want more. → Read More

What Would Really Happen if You Ate the 20-Year-Old Ravioli From The Last of Us

Bill and Frank were amazing, but not quite as amazing as eating decades-old canned ravioli and living to tell the tale. → Read More

The Tom Brady Movie Might Be the Greatest Scandal of His Career

And he involved Rita Moreno and Lily Tomlin? → Read More

I Did the Dumb Pasta-Strainer Thing to My Hair. It’s Actually Sort of Amazing.

I honestly think it's never looked better. → Read More

OK, I’ve Found the Answer to Our Various Presidents’ “Classified Document Problems”

Only one person can help you now. → Read More

Exclusive: Lydia Tár on Tár’s Oscar Nominations

Lydia Tár is real, and she has some, er, thoughts about the movie. → Read More

The People Who Make “Murder Kits” in Case They Go Missing Explain What the Hell They’re Doing

They're kinda like slightly paranoid bullet journals that hold your fingerprints, dental records, and DNA. → Read More

The Man Who Spent $1,244.22 on 464 Slices of New York Pizza Explains What He Learned

“I did not rate the slices to avoid controversy and bribes.” → Read More

Prince Harry’s Penis Has Quite a Time in His New Book. It Could Have Been Much, Much Worse.

“You’ve got to freeze that thing for a long time to really kill it.” → Read More

The Apparent Replacement for the New Year Resolution in 2023 Is Both Delightful and All Wrong

I mean, who doesn’t want more flip phones, sincerity, and digging a hole in your backyard this year? → Read More

The Absolute Least You Can Do to Protect Yourself Online Now

Anyone can use this security expert's simple advice ... even you! → Read More

ABC Has Committed a Grave Injustice on Us All With Its Response to the Good Morning America Affair

“We can’t operate with gossip, and speculation and rumors,” a network honcho said. Uh, yes we can! → Read More

Oh Dear, Fox News Kind of Has a Point About Those Balenciaga Ads

The teddy bears were one thing. The Supreme Court documents were another. → Read More

Every Question We Have About Naomi Biden’s White House Wedding

Starting with: The bride and groom live at the White House?? → Read More

80-Year-Olds Have Many Thoughts About 80-Year-Old President Joe Biden

And Rep. Jim Clyburn of South Carolina has some advice. → Read More