Evan Saathoff, Birth.Movies.Death.

Evan Saathoff


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Past articles by Evan:

Criterion Chan: HALF A LOAF OF KUNG FU

Yes, there are bad Jackie Chan movies. → Read More

Criterion Chan: THE YOUNG MASTER

It turns out the key to unstoppable kung fu is opium. → Read More

Sandler’s Netflix: MURDER MYSTERY

Move along, nothing to see here. → Read More

Sandler’s Netflix: THE WEEK OF

UNCUT GEMS for people who can’t handle UNCUT GEMS. → Read More

Superman Returns: Henry Cavill Is In Talks To Play The Man Of Steel Again

Maybe he’ll actually get to play a real Superman this time. → Read More

Streaming Fury: REVENGER

A gem hidden in the depths of the Netflix vault. → Read More

Sandler’s Netflix: SANDY WEXLER

About as indulgent as they get. → Read More

Cinema’s Greatest Triumphs: JUSTICE LEAGUE (The Whedon Cut)

One mustache away from being serviceable. → Read More

Looks Like Doug Liman Is Directing That Tom Cruise Space Movie

Does that mean he goes to space too? → Read More

SPAWN Movie “Seismic Event” Misinterpreted As Good Thing By Jason Blum

When god talks, you need to listen. → Read More

Sandler’s Netflix: THE DO-OVER

Sander and Spade cure cancer. It's not worth it. → Read More

The Chattanooga Film Festival: RED, WHITE & WASTED

You have to see it to believe it, and you still might not believe it. → Read More

Sandler’s Netflix: THE RIDICULOUS 6

For real, how bad can it be? → Read More

The Chattanooga Film Festival: SKULL Makes Skeletor Look Like An Asshole

Faces get sliced, priests have sword fights, a story gets told. → Read More

Forgotten Stallone: DAYLIGHT

Stuck between ASSASSINS, which is fun but not very good, and COP LAND, which absolutely rules, there is DAYLIGHT, Stallone’s big disaster film. Directed by the usually serviceable but rarely exciting Rob Cohen, DAYLIGHT does exactly what it supposed to do with the disaster film template. There just isn’t a whole lot of urgency to it. A bunch of people get stuck in the Holland Tunnel and only… → Read More

THE OLD GUARD Trailer Cannot Kill Charlize Theron

Though it looks like the movie will make many attempts. → Read More


More fake Shane Black than fake Michael Bay. → Read More

Forgotten Stallone: THE SPECIALIST

This film is a total blast. Not just because of the bombs. → Read More

Release Goddamn The Snyder Cut Already

The fans demand it. → Read More

Cinema’s Greatest Triumphs: THE LODGE

Don’t have kids. → Read More