Karl Pillemer
Psychology Today
Ithaca, NY, United States
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Past articles by Karl:
3 Rules for Getting Along With Your In-Laws
Expert advice for avoiding conflict, even when you don't see eye to eye. → Read More
Karl A. Pillemer, Ph.D.
Karl A. Pillemer, Ph.D is a professor of human development at Cornell University and professor of gerontology in medicine at the Weill Cornell Medical College. An internationally renowned gerontologist, his research examines how people develop and change throughout their lives. He has authored five books and over 100 scientific publications, and speaks throughout the world on aging-related… → Read More
The 3 Best Rules For Managing In-Law Relationships
"You don't just marry a person; you marry his or her family." In my → Read More
5 Tips for Avoiding Regrets about Love
Study of 700 people uncovered key advice for avoiding relationship regrets → Read More
What to Do in Your 30s to Be Happy in Your 50s
What can you do in your 20s and 30s to increase your chances of happiness later in life? Here are three key lessons from the real experts. → Read More
The Shortcut to Finding Your Purpose in Life
Finding a purpose or direction in life has become a challenge for many people (young and not-so-young). One solution is simpler than it seems: Interview your future self. → Read More
Four Great Relationship Hacks
Feel like your relationship is going stale? Here's some advice for people who've been through the relationship doldrums. → Read More
What Old People Know About Sex That You Don't
How can sex possibly stay interesting for a lifetime? I have good news for younger people. I'm going to allay your worst fears and help you to relax about the idea of sex in the later years of marriage. I will tell you the spoiler right now. It's pretty good. → Read More
3 Relationship Tips From People Who Have Been Married 50 Years
Looking for ways to reduce conflict in your relationship? I'd say most of us are, especially since it can often seem like the fights we have with our partner repeat themselves over and over again. → Read More
What Older Men Want Young Men To Know About Love
According to the older men, one key to a long marriage can be summed up as "give your partner's interests a try." Among unhappy couples and divorced elders, resentment of a spouse's independent interests shone through. The partner's passion... → Read More
The 3 Questions Everyone Should Ask Before Marriage
There's no perfect method or algorithm for choosing a mate. But according to the elders, taking a step back and asking these three questions about your relationship can help you avoid a tragic mistake -- or move you toward a long, fulfilling life tog... → Read More
The Marriage Mistake Almost Everybody Makes
Of course, there's no way to know for sure you're picking the right partner. But I gained a key insight from our interviews over the past several years with around 800 of the oldest Americans -- a group that if you add it all up had over 25,000 years of experience in marriage. → Read More
7 Questions We Need To Ask Every Older Person
I'm proposing a new holiday. Or rather, a new use for an old holiday. I believe that we should make Thanksgiving the day when we celebrate elder wisdom by asking older people to tell us their advice for living. Here's why. → Read More
Before 'I Do,' Ask This Question
In our interviews with hundreds of long-married couples about what works and what doesn't for a long and satisfying relationship... it turns out that our elders believe there's something close to a 'magic bullet' when it comes to deciding in a relationship: 'Should I stay or should I go?' → Read More
Top 10 Lessons for Living from the Wisest Americans
In contemporary society, we don't often ask our elders for advice. We're much more likely to talk to professionals, read books by pop psychologists or mo... → Read More