˗ˏˋ Ted Wilson ˎˊ˗, Electric Literature

˗ˏˋ Ted Wilson ˎˊ˗

Electric Literature

United Kingdom

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Recent:
  • Unknown
Past:
  • Electric Literature

Past articles by ˗ˏˋ:

If You’re as Obsessed with Wordle as We Are, Give These Spin-Offs a Try

Girdle, Curdle, and Larry Birdle are sure to keep you busy → Read More

Ted Wilson Says Goodbye to the World –

After eight years reviewing the world, this column has come to an end. This is my farewell. → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: A Comb –

Most people have hair as well as a desire to see that hair groomed, so this review will have very broad appeal. I came across a comb recently that was your standard black comb but with one exception… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Windex –

If you have a dirty window, you have two options; smash out all the glass, or clean it with Windex. Smashing the glass is dangerous, costly, and leaves your home vulnerable to intruders. But with… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Peter Piper –

Everyone has heard of Peter Piper, the guy who picked a peck of pickled peppers. But what else do we know about him? A lot, actually. Based on his name, we know Peter was a professional piper. In the… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: A Pony –

Have you ever seen a pony? I mean a pony in real life. If you haven’t, you should. Basically take a horse and shrink it down to hilariously small proportions and that’s what a pony is. When I came… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: My TV –

After my traditional TV succumbed to the ravages of time and a mouse, I made a bold decision. Rather than replacing my TV with a fancy flat-screen or one of those tiny portables you see being used in… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: The Tap Dancer in the Subway

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of the world. Today I am reviewing the tap dancer in the subway. Tap dancing is the art of dancing mainly with your feet while the rest of your body just… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: My Calculator –

Because so many people are either incapable of doing math in their head, or too lazy to do it on paper, someone invented the calculator. Thank goodness, because now I have one of the best calculators… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Spaghetti –

Eating spaghetti is like eating a big plate of flavorless hair. I know this because I once ate a big plate of flavorless hair when a jokester presented it to me as spaghetti. The two are no different… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Orchestra Conductors –

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of the world. Today I am reviewing orchestra conductors. If you’ve ever been to an orchestra, or seen one in a cartoon, you’ve probably wondered who that… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: My Overdue Library Book

Late at night when I wake up in a cold sweat, the cause is one of two things; the memory of the time I beheaded a deer with my car and the head came crashing through the windshield and the antlers… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: The Color Purple

There’s no denying that the color purple is the least liked color in the spectrum. Technically mustard brown is less appealing, but it’s used so infrequently that it doesn’t receive the same quantity… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: The Mayo Clinic

The Mayo Clinic is widely regarded as one of Minnesota’s top hospitals. To find out just how good it really is, I drove to Rochester to see for myself. Then I drove home because I accidentally drove… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Scott Bayo

The name Scott Bayo is a name you’re probably pretty sure you think sounds familiar. That’s because he played Fonzie’s sidekick Tchotchke in the hit series Happy Days. He later played an orphan whose… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Ice Cream Headaches

Roughly ten times a day I will randomly spin around as fast as I can to see if anyone is looking at me. About three out of ten times someone is. All that spinning makes me dizzy and gives me a… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Butter

It surprised me to learn butter is made from milk, due to the contrast between milk’s grossness and butter’s deliciousness. To make butter, first, a farmer has to squeeze a cow’s breast until milk… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: My Snowman

If you come from a part of the world where snow does not exist, let me explain what a snowman is. A snowman is a bunch of snow, formed into a shape that vaguely resembles that of a man. Unlike a… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: The Greatest Generation

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: The Greatest Generation ★★★★☆ (4 out of 5) Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of the world. Today I am reviewing the Greatest Generation. If I asked you what the greatest generation is, you would probably say millennials because they do seem quite popular. If you’re not a millennial yourself, you probably want to be one. I know I do. I’d love to be one if… → Read More

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Noma –

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Noma ★★★★☆ (4 out of 5) Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of the world. Today I am reviewing Noma. The city of Copenhagen is home to Noma, one of the world’s fanciest restaurants. Don’t get confused by the sign outside which looks a lot like it says “’Nomo,” and then walk right past the place like I did. I ended up wandering around the neighborhood for a… → Read More