Patrick Wyman
Deadspin
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Past articles by Patrick:
Who Cares About The UFC In 2018?
The UFC has its problems, but one stands out as more serious and scary than the rest: Fewer and fewer people are interested in what it’s selling. → Read More
Climate, Plague, And The Fall Of The Roman Empire
The Roman Empire in the west fell for a great many reasons. We could cite a lengthy series of breakdowns in its political structures, feckless leadership by a series of child-emperors and self-interested court officials, and aggressive and opportunistic barbarian groups. As the Empire fell apart, the whole Roman world the political unit had supported—a world of cities, trade between regions on… → Read More
Francis Ngannou Is The Most Exciting Talent In MMA
Talent, to paraphrase a Justice of the Supreme Court’s aphorism on the topic of pornography, is something you know when you see. It leaps off the page and jumps through a TV screen or off a stage. It’s something felt; the wonder of truly special genuine talent should rock even the most jaded observer. → Read More
How Latin Became The Romance Languages
The Latin language is one of the Roman Empire’s lasting legacies. We hear it around us every day in the form of direct Latin loan-words into English, like “abdomen” or “exterior.” Every time you say something is “necessary” or you need to make a “revision” to a document, you’re using a loan-word from French, which ultimately derives from Latin as well. Then, of course, we hear Latin’s… → Read More
Cris Cyborg Finally Gets To Prove She's The Most Dangerous Woman In The World
Women’s MMA has seen a succession of stars rise and fall over its five years in the UFC. → Read More
Where Is The UFC's Next Generation Of Stars?
Max Holloway is everything the UFC and its fans could possibly want in a young champion. His high-octane, aggressive, and dangerous but technical style makes him appealing to both the base desire to see blood and the intellectual side of fandom simultaneously. He could conceivably reign over one of the promotion’s most stacked divisions for years to come. → Read More
How The Roman Empire's Cities Crumbled
When we think of the Roman Empire as a physical space, cities are what come to mind. We see the huge bulk of the Coliseum. The ruined husks of aqueducts, bathhouses, and grand temples reach for the sky, reminders of the engineering prowess and resources the Romans had at their disposal. Those kinds of monuments, all residents of the Empire’s cities, define it in popular imagination far more than… → Read More
What Were The Knights Templar Really Like?
Over the last seven centuries, the Knights Templar have left the realm of history and entered the realm of pop culture. They’re a major plot point in Dan Brown’s The Da Vinci Code and the villains of the Assassin’s Creed series of games, and feature in an astonishing array of pseudo-history and conspiracy theories. → Read More
Tony Ferguson, Conor McGregor's Perfect Opponent, Will Likely Never Get To Fight Him
Saturday, at UFC 216, the UFC awarded an interim 155-pound belt to Tony Ferguson following a third-round triangle choke of Kevin Lee. It was a wild, action-packed, back-and-forth fight between two legitimate talents in MMA’s deepest and most compelling division. → Read More
Demetrious Johnson Is Still The Perfect Champion, And It Still Doesn't Matter To The UFC
The best fighter on Earth is a diminutive video-game enthusiast. He hasn’t lost a fight in six years. Along with Anderson Silva, he currently holds the record for consecutive title defenses in the UFC: 10 consecutive opponents have tried and failed to take his belt. Slick kickboxers, gritty grinders, hyper-athletic prospects, lethal grapplers, big punchers, and Olympic gold-medalist wrestlers… → Read More
Professional Mercenaries And Cannon Made Medieval War Obsolete
As the medieval world gave way to the early modern around 1500, European warfare was utterly transformed. Mounted knights and castles gave way to cannon, firearms, and enormously complex fortifications. The scale of war grew as well. Armies that had contained thousands of soldiers in the 15th century turned into tens of thousands in the 16th, then hundreds of thousands in the 17th and 18th.… → Read More
Mayweather-McGregor Showed What Boxing Has To Offer MMA
Floyd Mayweather beat Conor McGregor’s ass; McGregor put on a respectable effort against an elite boxer, winning a moral victory. McGregor looked as sharp as he could have, and showcased improved skills; Mayweather was a faded husk of his former self. The fight was competitive in stretches; the fight wasn’t close. → Read More
What Will The Fight At The End Of The Mayweather Vs. McGregor Circus Look LIke?
Everything about the leadup to Conor McGregor’s matchup with Floyd Mayweather this Saturday has been absurd. We had McGregor in a suit adorned with “Fuck You” in a vertical pinstripe pattern; dollar bills raining down from the heavens; confrontations between McGregor’s and Mayweather’s enormous security guards; and trash talk that tugged on racial and misogynistic fault lines. → Read More
Why Didn’t The Eastern Roman Empire Fall?
When the Roman Empire disintegrated over the course of the fifth century, only half of it actually fell, the western half. The eastern half of the Roman Empire would survive in one form or another for a thousand years. → Read More
Daniel Cormier's Best Was Great, But Not Great Enough
“I guess if you win both fights,” said Daniel Cormier, “there is no rivalry.” → Read More
War Is The Health Of The State
Have you ever stopped to wonder why practically every government on earth follows the same basic form? → Read More
Does Anybody Miss Michael Bisping?
Time waits for no one, as the Rolling Stones once said, and UFC middleweight champion Michael Bisping is currently in the process of proving the now-geriatric rockers right. → Read More
Could The Roman Empire Have Survived?
No empire, from Sargon’s Akkadian Empire to the Soviet Union, lasts forever. There’s always an expiration date. → Read More
Floyd Mayweather Jr. Is Fighting Conor McGregor. What The Fucking Fuck?
It’s really happening. → Read More
The End Of José Aldo
In championship-level combat sports, as with generations of inbred European royalty, there’s never really an interregnum. The end of one reign is simultaneously the beginning of another. The moment the new champion’s hand is raised and the belt fitted around his waist, we’re officially living in a new era. → Read More