Toni Hammer, YourTango

Toni Hammer


Portland, OR, United States

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  • Unknown
  • YourTango
  • Scary Mommy
  • Mamamia
  • Romper
  • Babble
  • HuffPost

Past articles by Toni:

30 Best Long-Distance Relationship Songs (For When You're Really Missing Him/Her)

When you live far away from your partner, you start to miss them over time. But you can combat loneliness with the best long-distance relationship songs. From Carol King to Barry Manilow, you'll feel like your boyfriend or girlfriend is closer than ever. → Read More

15 Super-Awkward Details About Gisele Bundchen And Tom Brady's Relationship

Though Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen have been married for a decade, there are plenty of strange details surrounding their relationship. From the timeline of their engagement to disagreeing politically, here's the inside scoop on their marriage, wedding and kids. → Read More

15 Super-Awkward Details About Prince Harry And Meghan Markle's Wedding And Relationship

When is the royal wedding? With the Royal Wedding fast approaching, there are plenty of details surrounding Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding, engagement and relationship that are a bit... strange. From leaving her job to family drama, the Prince Harry Meghan Markle wedding and ensuing royal drama won't be one to miss. → Read More

Real Talk: Some Days I Can't Stand My Kids

Life is hard. Kids are hard. Motherhood is hard. Admit it. You’ll feel better. → Read More

I Can't Poop When I'm Traveling (And It's Hilarious)

I am afflicted with the condition of Fecal Stage Fright. → Read More

What Netflix’s ‘Girlboss’ Taught Me About Chasing Dreams In My 30s

Sure, "Girlboss" is about a single 20-something, but just because I’m a married mom doesn’t mean I don’t get to have dreams anymore. → Read More

Hey Men Of The World, Stop Calling Women ‘Crazy’

You can call women a lot of things, but stop calling us crazy every time we intimidate you with our awesomeness. → Read More

Listen Up: We Need More Stores Where We Can Drop Off Our Kids While We Shop

Shopping with kids will test your sanity. For the greater good of humanity, we need more stores with play areas. → Read More

An Open Letter To My Daughter: I'm Sorry About The Misogyny You'll Inevitably Encounter

The road we walk as women is not easy, but don’t lose hope, child. → Read More

'Just Send Them Outside!' — It's More Complicated Than That For Many Families

I don’t want to raise kids who stay inside all day. But I also don’t have the option to tell them to just “go outside." → Read More

Enjoying Our Time Together Before My Firstborn Starts Kindergarten

This is it. These are the last few months I’ll have with my daughter before she starts school. → Read More

Camping With Kids Is A Great Vacation

My kids love camping. They really love it, which makes it the perfect summer getaway. → Read More

The Evolution Of A ‘Mean Mom’

I didn’t want to be a mean mom. But I also didn’t want to raise assholes. → Read More

I’m Not Going To Worry That My Daughter Has Anxiety –

It was 9pm and the 700th time my daughter had snuck out of bed. With an exasperated sigh I tried my best to be calm when I asked her why she was still awake. “I just can’t sleep, Mom,” she said, “I… → Read More

I Don’t Have A ‘Mom Tribe’ And I’m Okay With That

I don’t fit into any of the mom groups I’m surrounded by. I'm not mad at them. And I don't feel sorry for me. → Read More

I Lost My Daughter At The Zoo. She’s Fine, But I’m Still Shaken Up.

I can’t physically restrain my kids forever. What I can do is educate myself and them should they get lost. → Read More

My Son Sucks At Playing Alone, And It’s Driving Me F*cking Bonkers

It’s hard to feel anything but the crushing weight of mom guilt when your child seems so sad and lonely. → Read More

I’m Trying To Learn To Be Grateful For Help, Even When My Family Doesn’t Do It The ‘Right’ Way

My family may never get the floors as clean as I do, but they try, and that’s all that matters. → Read More

I Hope My Kids Always Know They Have A Soft Place To Land

When my kids are grown and need the comforts of home, I will follow my mother's lead: "The couch is always open, baby." → Read More

FOMO: I Am Definitely Not Afflicted With This Condition

I understand FOMO, really. But I’m a grown-ass woman who is going to do what’s best for me. → Read More